A Walk on the Wild Side Trying to understand the "nature" of Spirit is a journey that has kept me entertained, and fascinated, for years! Chasing it has proven fruitless. Trying to study it in books ends up with words that elude me, and sends me down more rabbit holes, with more questions than answers.
I have found that obtaining most anything in life is pretty simple in the regard that when I stop trying to "gain" something, or stop "trying" so hard, all of a sudden it appears, whatever that may be. My Spirit has proven to be no different ... without saying so, as it doesn't communicate with words. On some level, it must know that once words are spoken, the message has already been misunderstood. There took place a conversation between Dan Rather, CBS Anchor and Mother Teresa years ago that I resonate with. The interview went a little something like this: Dan Rather: What do you say during your prayers? Mother Teresa: I listen. Dan Rather: Well then, what does God say? Mother Teresa: He listens. And if you don't understand that, I can't explain it to you. I've learned that I can't desire something that I already have - but I can fully recognize it and allow myself to experience it. This was the start of a new Spiritual journey. Instead of chasing Spirit through books, workshops, lectures, etc, I decided to start living it, walking in it, taking notice of it in everything I do, everyone I see. That DIVINITY became apparent and I couldn't deny it, nor do I have any words for it. The best I can say about Spirit, is that it's meant to be experienced. One can not know Spirit, unless one experiences Spirit, and from what I've gathered, this experience is different for everyone. It's why there are millions of books, papers, churches, scriptures, classes, lectures ... the list goes on. Spirit is a singular essence (prana, ruach, chi, shakti, energy, vibration, orgone, ka) experiencing itself billions of different ways. There are currently 7.8 billion people on this planet, vibrating at different frequencies - sometimes several different frequencies through the course of a day. Add in all life forms, flora and fauna, minerals, the air, the tides, fire - all the basic elements that we scientifically know of, and we have ourselves a Spirit that just can't be defined in words, and yet we walk among it, breath it, eat it, live it ... EVERY DAY AND IN EVERY MOMENT. We like to think we know who we are - we do not. It wasn't until I allowed myself to stop and observe my surroundings, with childlike eyes, pretending that everything I saw had no label or definition, where I got my first glance at the Spirit that seems to reside within myself. Some call it the "watcher" the "observer", as this is all it does. Spirit doesn't think ... it doesn't have to. Spirit doesn't hold the duality as the other parts of our being does, that is for the Soul ... and I'll write about that in another blog entry. Spirit can serve as an endless portal of energy, creation, understanding and knowledge ... if we allow ourselves to get to know it, acknowledge it and understand that this is the indestructible, the undefinable, the "what" doesn't belong to us. We like to think we know who we are - we do not. Moving closer to a Spiritual life for myself, has me becoming quieter and quieter. This pandemic year has definitely allowed me the time to fall silent. I've gotten the rare gift and challenge of wrestling with my mind, tearing down walls that don't belong here. The realization that I am NOT who I think I am was a mind blower! WHOOSH! I've always carried the feeling, the notion, that I have/had something wrong - the definition of myself never quite sat right with me. It wasn't until this year that it became clear that my thoughts and definitions were a good "try", a good attempt at knowing myself, but then also realized how far off the course I actually was. Really glad I humble well. Walking in Spirit for me now means that I have choices. Choices in how I define life. Choices in how I react to situations and people. Choices in how I see my fellow brothers and sisters. My compassion has grown greatly. My sense and definition of purpose has been redefined. What I feel I am "owed" is close to being gone. What I feel I deserve, doesn't matter (mah-ter), as nothing belongs to me anyway. There is a new sense of freedom knowing that nothing in this 3D experience can hurt me, torture me, take something away from me, put me back ... in essence, there are no struggles, only experiences. The only struggles I have now are the ones that I make up in my mind, ego driven...and now I know it. My struggles can seem real, my earthly conditioning can seem real - but now I approach each one knowing that all it contains is "matter" ... and I get to choose what matters. I choose divinity. This feels more real to me than life ever has.
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A Perspective on healing/growing I've known about "Manifestation" and the plethora of definitions, the many perspectives, all the "how to's", to the point where I lost interest for many years. The subject became redundant, the information rehashed. Some of you may relate to this? However, it still runs the whole spectrum of groups currently in existence. We find this subject matter within our communities, spoken through our community leaders, our family/friends circles, even in ourselves. So I began to take a different look at it ... I then experienced it first hand. Now THAT was a "Ah-Ha" moment.
...and I'm going to share what I learned. 2020/Pandemic Year - I've been fortunate in that 2020 brought me the opportunity to tune in and dig deep within myself. I haven't ever, I don't think, been given circumstances that allowed me to grow and heal so much. Growth happened. Spiritual expansion and understanding - HAPPENED. Looking back through the year thus far, I can see clearly where Manifestation played a dynamic role in my life - self created, due to the will-ingness on my part. I learned how to create on a different level this year. While waist deep in healing work this year - AND THIS IS WHAT I WANT TO SHARE - I realized when I focused on a specific issue, or several at a time, this healing experience produced and magnified more of the same experience/s that caused me pain. I'm grateful I recognized this...as I kept wondering, "why does this keep happening?" or "Why am I dealing with this again? I thought it was already healed". Can you relate to this? I'd always figured that "stuff" coming up was part of the healing process, which is true; this is part of the healing process. What I realized though, it's a bit like Pandora's Box - my focus on healing was actually creating these "new" situations, that again, mirrored my pain. It wasn't happening outside of myself, although this is where I experienced it...tangible in an odd sort of way. I went deeper with this phenomenon ... the "I" aspect of myself created this situation with a different face, or in a different place. WHOA!!!! At this point, my jaw dropped and I had to admit, this was a definition of the word MANIFEST aka CREATION, I'd never thought of before. It gave me absolute clarity to what was happening. I could not deny my mind had a role to play here. Some of these things were happening BECAUSE of me. Just wow. Humble Pie?...anyone? This realization gave me a tremendous amount of power and control over what I want to experience and HOW I want to experience it. I'll take it as a gift - yes indeed. Everyone experiences places within themself that needs healing. We are constantly in different states of mind, often times all at once. With that, our focus is essential to obtain the goal, so we ARE going to have to rehash old habits, look at our behaviors and our conditioning. It's going to be a natural process to create more of the same until we obtain an understanding on how to release the root, at least get comfortable with whatever ails our hearts, to where it isn't a part of our daily lives, nor affecting our future any longer. While moving through all that this year, I've also been in a space, blessedly so, to be able to create new experiences, and witness these things being born outside of me - some are even blossoming right now...and it feels FANTASTIC! It feels like a victory in a year filled with an unknown virus (scientists are still trying to becomes masters over this thing. Hats off to them), wild fires, civil unrest, politic nightmares, economic distress and all the others things that just don't feel good right now. This is the point where I asked myself how much time I need to give to my healing process?, knowing I will manifest situations that parallel the original pain. The glory in this though, is now I know what's happening and I have a new found freedom in controlling what manifests. I also get to dedicate my time toward building my future legacy ... as Legacy has come up a lot this year - that story is for another post though. For this post ... I decided I'm going to experiment by applying the 80/20 Rule. I'm going to focus 80% of my precious time on creating my future legacy, and 20% on the healing process, because let's face it, healing old wounds HAS to be done. This will challenge my thinking in any given moment, as thoughts tend to be flighty, mine are at times anyway. Watching and checking in with my thoughts has gotten much easier and has started to become second nature. I've always been a participant of the different "watch your thoughts" clans out there roaming the planet. Try it for 2 weeks yourself and observe what happens when you are paying attention to your thoughts and the frequency of them. What's the percentage/s of time you give to each thought stream and what are the patterns you notice? You can then determine if this is what you want to be: A. Focusing on - as this will manifest your experience in the very next moment. OR B. Change the focus toward your goals and manifesting, perhaps, your own legacy! Your personal power lies in getting to choose which one. There's room for both, or perhaps you need to determine the balance of each one depending on what your goal is. I feel you get what is being said here... Create your own percentage that addresses both, but to where you experience more of the Legacy energy than you do the painful healing process (which again, just NEEDS to be done). Seriously - and it ain't no funz, neither. I encourage one just do it! ... ... for the sake of yourself and humanity. I'll close this entry out by saying, manifestation has my attention once again. I'll keep you posted on how this progresses... Soul Retrieval? What is it and why is this important to me? In my studies of human nature and where exactly the physical body stops and the Spirit starts (or the other way around), and also from my experience working with people for over 20 years and seeing the "dis-ease" and fragmentation that happens with our physical bodies, down to a cellular level, I started to seek a deeper understanding into this phenomenon and practice. It was interesting to learn there are many people who practice what is called "Soul Retrieval" ... the fragmentation of the energy body, the soul, as we move through this 3D plane. Soul retrieval is an exercise, with many techniques to accomplish this, where people work with the higher energies to retrieve pieces of their soul that have been "broken away" due to trauma, stress, unawareness, carelessness (many reasons) so that they can bring themselves back to a sense of Oneness. I thought to myself - SIGN ME UP! As stated earlier, there are many techniques to practice Soul Retrieval. Some people create very sacred spaces to do this - Shamans are particular when it comes to setting the stage for this practice ... calling in ancestors for assistance, totem animals and adding sacred items to the practice. Others like to go out in nature, as it's easier to ground themselves for it and they can also connect with the earth before and after their practice. Others still, have dietary preparations before they enter their practice of Soul Retrieval, eg. refrain from processed food, no alcohol or other mind altering substances that can inhibit the process. For myself - I simply found a comfortable space to be in my home, put some music on that induces a meditative state for me (as I connect best this way, through music) and just laid back, closed my eyes, set my intention of what I wanted to do and waited ... observed ... I don't know how much time went by before I saw myself lying there, my auric body starting to glow a bit more and growing around me. I thought, "this is kinda cool". I could feel that energy field filling up the space around me as I breathed - always aware of my breath. I noticed with each breath, the field grew a little more and became more clear and bright. I "felt" ready for the Soul Retrieval. I wasn't sure exactly how I wanted to do this, so I relaxed my mind and allowed my higher energies to come into play to assist in obtaining my goal. No sooner did I do that, I started to see little sparks of light coming toward me, penetrating my energy field and disappearing once they entered my energy "bubble", as it felt like a bubble around me. This went on for a time. While I relaxed and allowed these sparks of light to join me, they started to stream toward me, the sparks turned into streams of light, some thicker than others, some very thin. It was at this point, that certain people in my life became apparent to me. I could see them and sometimes there was an occurrence attached to it. This was pretty amazing to me as I realized the energy coming back to me was energy that I expended to that person, in that particular situation, at that particular time, and here it was now ... coming back to me, but purified. It seemed as if the outer ridge of my auric field was a protective layer between the energy and how it came back to me. It acted as my guard. I also took note of HOW GOOD it felt for these streams of light to penetrate my field and join me in, well ... ONENESS. That's the best way I can describe it, as the streams all felt familiar to me and they felt like they belonged to me. There came a point where the streams started to slow down, trickling in, and I just knew my session, my first session, with Soul Retrieval was coming to an end. It's almost like I felt full and I didn't need or want anymore. Such an interesting experience. The only other place I've noticed this is when I've run energy with animals or children. They somehow know when they've received enough and will simply get up and walk away. Done. Full. This is what it felt like. At this point, I showed my gratitude for my guides and helpers who joined me for the healing session and changed my breath to slowly come out of my meditative state. I allowed myself to just lay comfortably and assimilate what I just experienced. It was pretty amazing! I'm looking forward to expanding this practice more. Perhaps I'll go out in nature next time to see what that feels like. Perhaps I'll bring a few of my own sacred items that I like to have with me sometimes when I do Spiritual work. If any of you who are reading this has ever done a Soul Retrieval exercise, I'd love to hear about it. Feel free to share your experience in the comments below, (you can't see the box, just click below this blog post and it should show up). My hope is my share here inspires you to explore your own retrieval, however you'd like to go about it. Peace and Light! |
AuthorTiffany comes from a long line of Spiritual experience and Truth seeking. Here, she shares some of her favorite topics for contemplation. Archives
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